Till We Have Faces

Rereading this book has been a precious experience. I first read it about five years ago when I was attending another college. At the time I was experiencing a difficult, internal struggle. Although I was twenty years old, I was experiencing an identity crisis for the first time in my life. I still knew I was a daughter of God, but who I was as a person, my mission in life, my ability to influence the lives of other people seemed an intolerable void. I longed to wake up in the mornings and recognize the figure in the mirror and know she was happy and filled with purpose. Reading Till We Have Faces began the process of transformation. As I read about Psyche and her veiled face, I suddenly realized I did not have a face. I too wore a veil, or a mask as I called it, and had been living safely behind it. During that semester I wrote a poem called "This Mask I Wear" that portrayed the grief and emptiness I felt and the longing to receive a face and be able to cast off the covering I was living behind. This realization started a process of healing within me and the Lord took me on an incredible journey of finding myself throughout the rest of my time at the school. Soon before I left I wrote another poem that healed the pain and incompleteness of the first poem. I had now found myself. My heart and soul had been healed and I no longer wore a mask. I knew who I was, what purpose and mission the Lord had for me, and what I have to contribute to those around me. Rereading this book has helped me to reflect on that experience and see how much my life has been benefitted through gaining a face of my own, or discovering my face. The world around me is beautiful and I rejoice in feeling the Lord work through me to help my brothers and sisters. I'm grateful Lewis wrote this book and the tool it was to help me find myself.